Pickup lines that make you laugh

Did you fart? Because you blew me away
You must be in a wrong place – the Miss Universe contest is over there.
Was that an earthquake or did u just rock my world?
I may not be a genie but I can make your dreams come true
Are you a magnet cuz im attracted to you
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
I wish you were DSL so I could get high-speed access.
I know its not Christmas, but Santa’s lap is always ready.
Baby your like a student and I am like a math book, you solve all my
“Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this
Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for
Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
I was blinded by your beauty so I’m going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
I’m sorry, were you talking to me? Her: No. Well then, please start.
I know I dont have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.
Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?
Hey I just realized this, but you look alot like my next girlfriend.
Are your legs tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day long.
Are you lost? Because heaven’s a long way from here.
POOF! (What are u doing?) I’m here, where are your other two wishes?
I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.
Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!
If you were the new burger at McDonalds you would be the Mcgorgeous!
Do you have the time? (she gives you the time) No, the time to write my number down .
Let’s make like a fabric softener and snuggle.
Are you an interior decorator? When I saw you the room became beautiful.
Hello, I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.
Is that top felt? [No] Would you like it to be?
Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Is your last name Gillete cause your the best a man can get.
Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.
I’m invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?
You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me.
I have never had a dream come true until the day that I met you.
You look life my first wife! (how many have you had?) none.
Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?
I’m addicted to yes, and I’m allergic to no. So what’s it gonna be?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say… “I’m not really this tall….I’m sitting on my wallet.”
This is a test of the emergency pickup line service. Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pickup line.
If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.
I know I’m not a grocery item but I can tell when you’re checking me out.
If beauty were sunlight, you’d shine from a million light-years away.
Do you mind if I hang out here until its safe back where I farted.
Life without you would be like a broken pencil…pointless.
Your body is a wonderland and i want to be Alice.
I’m like chocolate pudding, I look like crap but im as sweet as can be.
Can I have directions? [“To where?”] To your heart.
Are you an alien? because you just abducted my heart.
Did you fart, ’cause you blow me away!
I hope there’s a fireman around, cause you’re smokin’!
If you were a booger I’d pick you first.
Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it’s just a sparkle.
You’ve been a bad girl/boy. Go to my room.
If beauty were time, you’d be an eternity.
Do you know karate? ‘Cause your body is really kickin’.
Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
Like the sheets on your bed I want cover you with love.
Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down; go ahead say no.
I hope your day is as radiant as your smile.
You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.
Are you an alien?, because you just abducted my heart.
What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.
I can tell your future, it is you giving me your number.
Hi, I’m Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
Giant polar bear (What?) It’s an icebreaker. Hi, my name is….
Your so hot when i look at you I get a tan
I must be a snowflake, ‘cuz I’ve fallen for you.
You look so sweet your givin me a toothache.
My love for you is like the universe…neverending!!
If looks could kill you would be a weapon of mass destruction.
You – “Did it hurt”. The other person will naturally say “Did what hurt?”, You – “When you fell from heaven.”
Excuse me, can you empty your pockets? I believe you have stolen my heart.
Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!
You say “I bet you $20 I can kiss you without using my lips.” She says, “Bet’s on.” You kiss her then say, “I lost.”
You got something on your chest: my eyes
Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I’m here after.
I don’t know if you’re beautiful or not, I haven’t gotten past your eyes yet.
What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.
I’m not drunk, I’m just intoxicated by you.
Do you want to make millions? millions of babies!
The night is young, the moon is bright, and you are here with me tonight.
I wanna bag you like some groceries.
kiss me if I am wrong, but isn’t your name (take a guess)…Janice????
Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only TEN I see

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